my talents include being able to sit on the toilet for 30 minutes being distracted by my phone
"you look like your parents"
yeah i have this theory called genetics
i hope i lose 800 pounds by tomorrow morning
I hope I gain £800 by tomorrow morning
we may be millions of miles apart but just talking to you is more than enough and always makes my day
When your mum yells at you and says you cant go out on the weekend
If you’re reading this, you’ve been in coma for almost 20 years now. We’re trying a new technique. We don’t know where this message will end up in your dream, but we hope it works. Please wake up, we miss you.